【英検2級ライティング対策】実際に解いた生徒さんの解答・修正・解説”Nowadays, many Japanese people are doing volunteer work. Do you think the number of these people will increase in the future?”
Nowadays, many Japanese people are doing volunteer work. Do you think the number of these people will increase in the future?
そしてポイントは以下の3つです。
・Community
・Experience
・Payment
※語数の目安は80-100語です。
あなたの意見とポイントのテーマを2つ使用して、理由を書きましょう。
皆さんならどう書きますか?
生徒様の解答
生徒様の解答はこちらです。
I don’t think the number of these people will increase in the future. I have two reasons.
First reason is that if we volunteer it will be so tired. for example, fundraising it will be tired and we can not do anything.
Second reason is that if we volunteer you don’t get paid and loss many time. Also we we having a hard time and we can’t help other people.
there for I don’t think the number of these people will increase in the future.
(85words)
細かなミスが目立ちますので、修正して試験に備えましょう^^。
修正文
模範解答を見てみましょう。
I don’t think the number of these people will increase in the future. I have two reasons.
First reason is that if we do volunteer work, it will be so tiring. For example, fundraising will be hard and we can not do anything else.
Second reason is that if we do volunteer work, you don’t get paid and lose a lot of time. For example, if we keep doing it, we will not have the time with our family.
Therefore, I don’t think the number of these people will increase in the future.
(90words)
1つずつ見ていきましょう^^。
1つめの理由
1つめの理由から見ていきましょう。
First reason is that if we volunteer it will be so tired. for example, fundraising it will be tired and we can not do anything.
First reason is that if we do volunteer work, it will be so tiring. For example, fundraising will be hard and we can not do anything else.
「ボランティア活動をする」は英語で、”do volunteer work”です。
問題文が参考になることが多いので、よく読みましょう。
Nowadays, many Japanese people are doing volunteer work. Do you think the number of these people will increase in the future?
ボランティア活動は(私たちを)疲れさせる側ですか?
それともボランティア活動が疲れる側ですか?
ボランティア活動は疲れさせる側ですね。
ボランティア活動が、私たちを、疲れさせる。
ここは過去分詞ではなく、現在分詞を使用します。
×if we volunteer it will be so tired.
〇if we do volunteer work, it will be so tiring.
主語が受動態なのか、能動態か、ここはしっかり確認しましょう。
2つめの理由
2つめの理由にいきます。
Second reason is that if we volunteer you don’t get paid and loss many time. Also we we having a hard time and we can’t help other people.
Second reason is that if we do volunteer work, you don’t get paid and lose a lot of time. For example, if we keep doing it, we will not have the time with our family.
文の構成は、抽象→具体の順番です。
ですが生徒さんの具体文は、どちらかというと1つめ理由を具体的に書いています。
1つめ
ボランティア活動は疲れる、大変
2つめ
無給労働、時間が失われる
2つめの意見を具体的に書く場合、
「無給だと何が起こるか、ボランティア活動して他の時間がなくなるとどうなるのか」
ここを説明するとよいでしょう。
抽象文からそれずに、具体文まで書けたらとてもレベルの高い文が書けるようになりますよ^^。
最後にもう一度
最後に、修正した文をもう一度見てみましょう。
音読すると、理解度アップするのでぜひ試してください^^。
I don’t think the number of these people will increase in the future. I have two reasons.
First reason is that if we do volunteer work, it will be so tiring. For example, fundraising will be hard and we can not do anything else.
Second reason is that if we do volunteer work, you don’t get paid and lose a lot of time. For example, if we keep doing it, we will not have the time with our family.
Therefore, I don’t think the number of these people will increase in the future.
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